by Anonymous
Sick Bastard Funny Saying
I kept wondering why the ball was getting closer. Then it hit me!
Other Funny Sayings and Quotes:
No matter where you go – You’re always there! And you’re never there, because you’re always here!
Alcohol is not the answer, it just makes you forget the question.
I like being single. I’m always there when I need me.
Reality is a nice place, but I wouldn’t want to live there.
Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.
An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!'
You can't have everything....where would you put it?
People like you are the reason people like me take pills.
Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
Some people are alive only because it is illegal to kill them.
The last time I took advice, it only worked because I changed it.
You can't have everything....where would you put it?
The reason grandchildren and grandparents get along so well is because they have a common enemy.
I became self employed and I still have a jerk for a boss.
If you need advice, text me...
If you need a friend, call me...
If you need me, come to me...
If you need money...
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